Skip to main content

Life is never as you planned it

I last blogged in September 2018.

I honestly hadn't realised it had been so long since I last wrote in here.

One thing that has become clear is that sometimes the life you plan and hope for is not the one you're going to get. Or at least it might not happen the way you think it's going to happen or when you think it will.

A lot of people are doing the ten year reflection, but for me, to simply reflect back to where I was when I last posted to today is enough. My life is almost unrecognisable in some ways and in others not different at all. I'm still a parent but the way I'm parenting is very different. There's still two parents but we are both dealing with our own battles, travelling our own paths while trying hard to keep our child at the heart of what we do.

Parenting a child when you're separated is a totally different ball game. I'm still trying to work out how to do this, how much to communicate and share, how much is too much, when is it too little? How much to be responsible for....

There's no winners right now, but I'm hopeful in time the three of us will be in a happier more stable place, independently.

Comments

Popular posts from this blog

Pretty breastfeeding underwear

A while back,when boobs first started their pregnancy bloom, I struggled with finding nursing bras in those larger sizes, and that were also pretty, and affordable.  Following Oscar's arrival, the post baby bloom arrived and the search was on once more. My friend Annie who shares similar traits to me sent me a link one day which brought a ray of hope.  She suggested I look at an online shop, very appropriately called nursing-brashop .   At first glance I was immediately impressed by the set up and the very clear indications that it catered to sizes across the board, including those elusive larger sizes. As well as browsing by size you can also browse by brand, and by type. I was impressed with the variety of types of bras available.  Far better than I'd been able to search for elsewhere. I quickly placed an order for two bras, one plain and simple, and one pretty one as a treat for myself.  The shop made me even happier when I discovered free UK deliv...

Panic!

I woke up on Monday morning with an honest to God freak out. In three weeks I return to work after nearly 11 months off work. Jeez Louise where has that time gone? I remember before I went on maternity leave I had ideas about what I would do during my time off and how when I returned to work I would be in such a great routine that everything would run seamlessly. Er.. No. Quite the opposite, I have a baby who hates naps, unless he sleeps on you and doesn't particularly like sleeping at night. I somehow manage to fit in (just about) mealtimes, and attending appts and play sessions. Housework? Don't be ridiculous,  my son is incredibly lucky, and I'm incredibly surprised that he has clean clothes to wear every day. There have been occasions where I realised I was dressing him in his last set of clean clothes and the panic washing and drying without a tumble dryer has begun. When I return to work in 2 and a half weeks I'm either going to fall apart or become super ef...

Fun resolve

I began this journal when I first found out I was pregnant. I had no way of knowing what kind of road was ahead of me.  I could never have known just how hard it would be and how equally delightful it is. Being a parent has challenged every preconception I ever had about parenting. All the "rules and "ideals" were quickly thrown out of the window and many short sharp lessons were learned. Every day is a lesson.  A lesson in my son, a lesson in family dynamics, a lesson in responsibility, and a lesson in life. I cant predict what each day will bring and I can't promise I will enjoy all my lessons. But I do know each lesson is full of unquestionable love, even through dark days and the occasional tear of my own. As 2018 gets ready for autumn I find myself thinking about the challenges yet to come. The future is full of promise. I promise to continue being the best parent that I can. I know I won't be perfect but I will always do what I think is right and I...